Some Communication Tips:
Do...
...Approach from the front. Don’t startle or reach out to her until she has smiled at you or indicated in some way that she is happy to see you.
...Keep your tone light and speak clearly.
...Avoid long sentences; the person might become confused midway through your “speech”
...Help your loved one gain a sense of authority by structuring your conversations in a manner that provides positive reinforcement.
...Hold his hand or offer a hug if he appears receptive. (Remember Maslow… Physical affection remains an important need throughout life).
...Become a master Politician and avoid speaking in absolutes. You never know how the things you say could directly conflict with the “reality” your loved one is living at that moment. Keep your words neutral so you can change tack as needed.
...Remember that although their memories are failing, many patients can participate in the "here and now" long into the disease. They will continue to pick up on things that are happening around them.
...Foster an environment in which the person feels intelligent. Talk to them about things you already know they remember, such as famous pop culture trivia from their era (e.g. "I like Ike" and famous advertising slogans)
...Use Music! The brain stores musical information differently. Song lyrics and famous slogans are more readily accessible and the things that pop out might surprise you!
Don't...
...Ask open-ended questions, such as “What would you like to eat?” Instead ask, “Would you like chocolate or strawberry ice cream?” (Providing an answer within the question gives the person a sense of autonomy and empowerment.)
...Expect the person to know who you are. It is more important that this person feel the love and respect you are offering.
...Say “no” or scold. If a person with dementia is still in the early stages, they often struggle with the concept of losing some independence and authority over their actions. He or she is very likely to harbor some resentment toward anyone who might be seen as taking that away from them.
For example:
Don’t say, “Miss Daisy, did you enjoy riding in cars?
Instead ask, “Miss Daisy, I heard you had a big beautiful Chrysler that you enjoyed riding in. Did you love that car?
Again, offering a piece of information in your questions can help make the person feel at ease. Also, by showing how well you know the person, you can gain a little trust with the person, even if Miss Daisy is not really sure who you are.
Sundowning:
There is no real scientific evidence to support the notion of sundowning. However, many professional caregivers can tell you with absolute certainty that it exists.
Sundowning is the term applied to behavioral changes that occur in the late afternoon/early evening. Usually this manifests as increased agitation and paranoia. You might see the person suddenly wish to be some place different, or demand that everyone get out of her house. She might suddenly think it’s time for her husband to come home from work, and it’s time to prepare dinner. When these episodes occur, remember to help the person stay calm and don’t directly contradict their beliefs.
Do...
...Approach from the front. Don’t startle or reach out to her until she has smiled at you or indicated in some way that she is happy to see you.
...Keep your tone light and speak clearly.
...Avoid long sentences; the person might become confused midway through your “speech”
...Help your loved one gain a sense of authority by structuring your conversations in a manner that provides positive reinforcement.
...Hold his hand or offer a hug if he appears receptive. (Remember Maslow… Physical affection remains an important need throughout life).
...Become a master Politician and avoid speaking in absolutes. You never know how the things you say could directly conflict with the “reality” your loved one is living at that moment. Keep your words neutral so you can change tack as needed.
...Remember that although their memories are failing, many patients can participate in the "here and now" long into the disease. They will continue to pick up on things that are happening around them.
...Foster an environment in which the person feels intelligent. Talk to them about things you already know they remember, such as famous pop culture trivia from their era (e.g. "I like Ike" and famous advertising slogans)
...Use Music! The brain stores musical information differently. Song lyrics and famous slogans are more readily accessible and the things that pop out might surprise you!
Don't...
...Ask open-ended questions, such as “What would you like to eat?” Instead ask, “Would you like chocolate or strawberry ice cream?” (Providing an answer within the question gives the person a sense of autonomy and empowerment.)
...Expect the person to know who you are. It is more important that this person feel the love and respect you are offering.
...Say “no” or scold. If a person with dementia is still in the early stages, they often struggle with the concept of losing some independence and authority over their actions. He or she is very likely to harbor some resentment toward anyone who might be seen as taking that away from them.
For example:
Don’t say, “Miss Daisy, did you enjoy riding in cars?
Instead ask, “Miss Daisy, I heard you had a big beautiful Chrysler that you enjoyed riding in. Did you love that car?
Again, offering a piece of information in your questions can help make the person feel at ease. Also, by showing how well you know the person, you can gain a little trust with the person, even if Miss Daisy is not really sure who you are.
Sundowning:
There is no real scientific evidence to support the notion of sundowning. However, many professional caregivers can tell you with absolute certainty that it exists.
Sundowning is the term applied to behavioral changes that occur in the late afternoon/early evening. Usually this manifests as increased agitation and paranoia. You might see the person suddenly wish to be some place different, or demand that everyone get out of her house. She might suddenly think it’s time for her husband to come home from work, and it’s time to prepare dinner. When these episodes occur, remember to help the person stay calm and don’t directly contradict their beliefs.